学写blog练习英文，谁好心帮我更正一下，多谢先

xbadx

写的很长，挑出错误的句子帮我改一下就十分感谢了
每次大家的幫助都讓我感覺獲益良多
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Long Relationship 1
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Some days before, I read a girl’s blog.
The girl said she wanted to build a long-longrelationship with her next boyfriend.

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On another day, another girl told me, herboyfriend had never shout at her before their couple, nevertheless “Shout to mea lot afterwards”, “It is all my faults though... ...”.
>_<
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She was not along, there was 3rdgirl’s told me she just decided to split up with her six years boyfriend beforetheir wedding, “Siaojun, you don’t know, before I accepted him, he was verygentleman.
After couple started shoutingat me, after gone bed became colder, after engage treated me even worse.
Once he was unhappy, he picked up a chair andthrew out.
It didn’t hit me though, 2legs of the chair broken.
I was so scared:it seemed these deteriorations would never end.
Suddenly an idea came to my mind, ‘Better I choose to quit now, since Iam still young, still got other chances.’”
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Whereby the problem arises, before a girlsatisfy a guy’s sexual desires, how could she know if the guy is chasing heronly because of sexual desires?

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For the girls who want build long-longrelationships, I always suggested them to have a good temper.
First of all, it can help building somethingattractive besides a girl’s beauty.
as girlslike to tell me, “I don’t like guys love me only because of my beauty.”
I agree.
But if you had a very hot temper, made characters of yourself notadorable at all, how could expect a guy come to chase u was not only because ofur beauty?
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In addition, a good temper will let thelove accumulated.
There are some guysand girls have very bad temper in Sunway College.
Sometimes their friends kidding on somethingthat they didn’t like, within just a second, a best boy/girl friend can be transferredto the worst guy in the world: evil, bitch, pervert, f*cking idiot, sucker, bloodhell........ all kinds of words could be screamed out.
I have seen a few times and heard a lot.
If I were those boyfriends being shouted at,I would wonder in my heart, how many percentages were true when she said sheloved me before.
No couple could afford toruin all their relationship foundation and rebuild it every 2 month.
It will be a less than 2 month relationshipregardless how many years you have been together.
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Third benefit, good temper is a goodsubstitute of sex on testing boyfriends.
What i am thinking is, after we marry, we cannot hope to use hot temperto control the family.
Sooner or lateranother side will not be able to bear any longer.
We have to find someone we could be kind tohim/her, while him/her will not turn back and utilizing our kindness.

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It is important when appear to have a goodtemper and let others to show their nature.
Like the Mr. Help, who had 2 girlfriends, as I told u before.
Mr. Help needed money to treat girls and hewas not working (I don’t know how he cheated girls where he got money lah~.)
But he won’t buy anything when livingtogether: rice, umbrella, toilet paper, wash liquid, gas, nor slippers.
Wash liquid and gas didn’t matter much to me,a big bottle of wash liquid from Carrefour was only RM5 and a tank of gas wasRM27, the whole year we’d only finished 1 tanks of gas and 2 big bottles ofwash liquid, I paid the RM37.
RM2 permonth doesn’t matter much to me, though I was poor.

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Another help student also not buy anything,but we were good friends and he always shared his food with me.
The 50 years, devoiced aunty had a very hottemper, no one dare to touch her things and she not using others as well.

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Only the Mr. Help became more and more problematic.
After his own slipper broken, he didn’t wantbuy a new pair.
Often when needed tohang out my clothing in the yard, I had no slipper to ware.
Especially the umbrella, after the rain theumbrella was still wet, often I had to hang it outside on our yard.
Mr. Help needed to go back to Penang, his hometown for weekend, and just took myumbrella away from Friday until Monday.
Umbrellas were not cheap, every month I had to buy 2-3 umbrellasback.
Politely discussed with him alsonot much use, he often replied he didn’t know that was my umbrella, broken/lostalso never bought a new one back.

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However my patience and good temper has itspay off, at least I know Mr. Help was not the kind of person you could treathim politely.
He had a personality of utilizingothers’ kindnesses.

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On contrary, once auntie’s umbrellamissing, she asked around everyone, “have u stolen my umbrella?”
Even i showed her i had my own umbrella, shekept saying, “if u have lost my umbrella, please buy 1 back!”
“incase u’v forgotten lah~”
She was sostrict and her temper so hot, her umbrella always put in the yard, Mr. Helpseldom did dare use it.
Her hot temperalso paid off, she had divorced.
On her50 years old, working and living in SS15 alone.
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What i am thinking is, after we marry, wecannot hope to use hot temper to control our families.
Sooner or later another side will not be ableto bear any longer.
We have to findsomeone we could be kind to him/her, while him/her will not turn back andutilizing our kindnesses.

浮萍

想用英文写blog却要人家帮你改英文？？还是头一此看到咧，呵呵。。。

rioj

阿girl,你今年多大？

xbadx

how to improve without practice？ i am 20 something

rioj

小妹啊，你的中文掌握的比英文好吧？ 何不写一篇中文的，感情写得深刻一点，再来以英文书写。大家一起切磋。 写作还是有一定技巧的，怎么开引句，主体思想，结尾，怎样遣词用字，以中文来写，比较有把握吧？

不客气地说，你这篇可以丢进recycle bin。

IdontWantToDie

leesiaojun应该是男生。。。

可以帮你一点，看我忙不。。。

IdontWantToDie

不是很肯定。。。很久没有碰英文，也不注重语法了。。。

Eternal Relationship 1
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Several days ago, I read a girl’s blog.
The girl said she wanted to have a longer-relationship with her next boyfriend.
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Some other day, another girl told me, her boyfriend had never shouted ather when they are couple/before they splited, not even shoutd at her afterwards, It has always been my faults though... ...”.
>_<

果然不简单改...有些不肯定是错的，但是觉得怪，所以还是改了。
高手也帮忙纠正。
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